Final blues

I'm having a nice pity party. Turns out, mediocrity is my specialty. I got a B in my health assessment class. Final grade: 89.3 percent. That's one point out of 768 points that's keeping me from my A. Dammit....

One additional point on an online quiz (I missed three!). A half question on any exam. Just 10 more minutes of studying.

I think it's God smiting me for not going to confession last night like I had planned. Steve said God stopped smiting people in the Old Testament, but I kinda think he still does it, but just on a smaller scale.

On a less whiny note, I got an A in patho. Like it matters now. I'm going back to my party. It's on the couch and it's cozy, in case you were wondering.

The calm before the shit starts hitting my life

I feel bad complaining that I don't have much to do right now. Like today. Out of class by 1. I talked to some old (dear-old, not old-old) friends on the phone. I watched my show (Rafe is, like, so hot!).

My paper is done. I'm pretty solid on my grades. Finals next week. It's been very nice outside.

But in about a month, that all ends. Two clinicals a week. One in Springfield, which is only about an hour and a half away. Crazy... But life is much too fun right now to be blogging.

Bye.......

One more week

I have one more week of classes, followed by a week of finals, and I'm done with this first session.

Wow. I should feel great about almost being 25 percent done with nursing school. But all I feel is nervous. Nervous about this second, more strenuous second session schedule. Nervous about two clinicals a weeks. Nervous about being busy while everybody else gets to enjoy summer. Nervous about my hour and a half commute with a new carpool partner.

Also, I spent six straight hours locked in my basement cave today writing a five-page paper. FIVE PAGES. And I'm a writer! What happened to my brain?

I spoke too soon

I recently e-mailed a friend of mine about how being in back in school at 36 was really no big deal.

This is what I get for bragging.

It's not enough that the girls (it's nursing school, so almost all women/girls) were talking about getting wasted recently, or that they'll be headed to the bar at 2 p.m. tomorrow afternoon for St. Pat's Day. But, I was the volunteer for our neurology assessment today, which includes reflexes. My reflexes were horrible. While the 23-year-old's were practically kicking themselves in the head with their super-awesome reflexes, mine were barely visible mini kicks, which I guess is sort of age related.

Now, I can take the funny talk about being old, the self deprecation and the idea of being the "sort of (not really) coolish, olderish person." But it's a whole different story when it's physiological.

Nothing like the body saying "Don't you think you're a little old for this?"

Not a superhero

I can't do it all. Well, I guess I can, but I can't and stay sane.

So I backed out of a freelance job I had taken over spring break. I took it specifically to do over break, but it's Thursday and no assignment yet. So I quit.

It's official. I'm a quitter.

This is just a small public confession to my feeling bad. Somehow, it always makes me feel better. Thanks for listening!

What mediocrity feels like

In just a few short weeks, I'll be done with my first session of nursing school. One down. Four to go.

This is good news and it seems like passing won't be the problem I originally expected. But after this brutal week of tests, it seems I'm getting a 89 percent average on tests in two classes.

OH MY GOD... An 89 percent!!!!

Steve tells me my insane desire to get all As all the time is, well, insane. Whether I get As or Cs in all my classes has very little bearing on my nursing career (unless there's a grad school in my future, which Steve tells me is just simply not the case) but I can't help but feel getting all As is the only acceptable route.

I might be more open to Bs if I wasn't carrying a strong A in the class I had thought would be the hardest. Of course I'm speaking of pathophysiology. That's right. I'm a super nerd.

Speaking of nerds, tell me this isn't the finest grouping you've ever seen. Last day of clinicals. I'm free. I'm free (for a few days). I'm finally free....

There can be only one....

(good one)....

Turns out, only one child at a time can be the good one. Like, Carolyn's a handful and Penny's sweet as sweet potato pie. Carolyn starts doing great in school and being really considerate, and Penny kicks me during an evening walk, just because she's pissed off.

Penny was pretty sick about a week ago. She had it pretty bad (virus, fever, pain... pretty much the whole nine ugh yards). I think I've mentioned this before, but when she's sick, she pretty much just lays on the couch and is super cuddly. But, surprise-surprise, when she comes out of it, bad things happen. And this time was not only not an exception, it was an example.

But I was pretty much aware of nothing. That's because I took four tests this week. I wrote three papers. I did an abdominal exam proficiency. And that's what I did.

Incidentally, I also scared the shit out of my Adult Nursing 1 instructor yesterday as I ran by her on the trail, scream "HI!!!!" and kept on running when it became clear she had no idea who I was.

Sorry for posting a series of non sequiturs. But that's what my life is right now. A moment here. A moment there. Turns out, I'm not really anywhere. Also, I've given up Facebook for Lent so I need a place to put all my small, insignificant thought(s).