Spoke too soon

Turns out, Carolyn is still 2. Terribly 2.

Today the ladies at the gym said she was sticking everything in her mouth. She has turned the word, "No," into a euphemism for "Screw you mom." And it's not at all uncommon for her to say, "I want (a cookie, to watch Pony show, to hit my sister), right NOW."

No wonder people stick little kids in front of the television. It's so much easier than talking to them.

But it comes and goes. She'll be 16 one day and a perfect angel, I'm sure.

Anyhow, did you know the MMR Varicella Vaccine cost $236? No? Well, that's probably because your insurance covers it. Mine, on the other hand, did not.

But I did learn today the state will sell me the same vaccine for $16.

Oh well. Who needs that extra $220?

Unexpected pleasures

I love it when the girls do unexpected things. Like when Carolyn says something that sounds very adult or I tell Penelope to get her sister and she goes straight for Carolyn's room or when Carolyn counts to 10 in Spanish.

Love it!

You know what I don't love? When Penelope wakes up for three hours in the middle of the night and vomits all over everything. Unexpected? Yes. Pleasure? Not so much.

When Frosty melts

Carolyn is having a really hard time dealing with Frosty's slow and obviously painful death. Right outside her bedroom window, Carolyn has watched our snowman conform to neighborhood celebrity to object of pity. And, maybe later today, subject of mercy.

Yesterday, when temperatures reached into the 40s, the poor thing actually fell over and Carolyn insisted I "fix" him. So I put the melty, dirty snow back together as well as I could, including the head, which I constructed from the snowball-sized noggin of the original snowman along with the mostly melted baby snowman. Eww.

Today, when even the baby hat fell off, Carolyn again asked to fix the snowman. So I explained that snowmen go away when it gets warm but come back every time it snows.

She thought about this for a minute and finally said, "Frosty's broken. The sun did it."

Now I know how Karen from "Frosty the Snowman" felt. I've posted my version of the missing scene from that holiday cartoon, on my Web site, www.gardnerwrites.com

Thank you, oh thank you

In what can only be called a great miracle, both girls slept this morning until 7:30. That is after three consecutive days of pre-6 wake-up calls.

I can't imagine a better way to start the day. For anybody who has slept until 10 in the last year, 7:30 is a very, very, very big deal around here. VERY.

I haven't been posting much because it's been cold and we've pretty much slipped into hibernation mode. Boring. I am so ready for spring to be here.

Here's a short list of what they girls are up to:

Carolyn. Got her hair cut at the beauty shop today. Talking in very fun sentences, i.e., "Daddy. My birthday is in a couple of weeks." and after sharing one of her 132 Cheerios with Penny, "That's enough Penelope. One more and that's enough." Also, she seems to be coming out of her terrible 2 stage, I say very apprehensively.

Penelope. She's totally walking/running. She said, "UhOh," and makes seriously cute faces. She's just a very cute, happy baby.

More snow?

Sure. Here's a movie...

Finally

Some real snow. The morning didn't offer too much in the way of good packing snow, but by afternoon, we had snowman-building snow. So that's exactly what we did.

Seriously, if it's going to be winter, we might as well have snow. Carolyn loved it and we endured the nine-hour session getting ready (boots, snow pants, jacket, scarf, hat, mittens, etc) to play. Now, if it were only June... Ah June...

Anyhow, here are some pictures from today.

I rock

Seriously, I'm loving my Web site. Check it out and hire me to write for large bags of money (complete with little dollar signs on the side) for an international audience.

I prefer to work on an oversea's assignment, something seaside. I'll be expecting my plane ticket in the mail next week.

Top Five Reasons I Need a Date

Number 5: I think of my weekly McDonald's trip with the girls as "eating out."

Number 4: If I don't get my midday catnap, I'm super grumpy come 5 p.m.

Number 3: When scouting for new friends, I'll only consider women with children 2 or older.

Number 2: I call wine, "grown up drink," even after the girls are in bed.

And reason number 1 that I need a night out without children: I not only know all the words to the songs on the "Jo-Jo Circus" CD, it's my favorite CD of the moment.

But who wouldn't love these words,

Jump for Joy. Come on now little lion.
Jump for Joy. There's no harm in trying.
Bend you knees and get down really low,
and when you jump, see how high you'll go.

Someone help me.

You know you're old when...

You go into your 2-year-old daughter's room and tell her to turn that noise down. It's a "Jo-Jo Circus" CD (Lord help us when she develops an appreciation for rock/rap/punk/who-knows-what) and the said daughter likes to play it loud. Very loud.

And now I have to wonder, when our parents told us to turn down the music because it would hurt our ears, were they really worried about our ears? Or were they just trying to get a little peace and quiet?

When I was 2 years old...

...I threw my very first tantrum. I threw my very first tantrum by crying all day. I had no interest in play.

I would not do as told... When I was 2 years old.

It seems like Carolyn would understand not to dump a whole glass of water on the living room coffee table. Not to steal her sister's beloved blankie and then taunt her with it. Not to eat butter or hit me on the head with a screwdriver or try and ride Fife across the living room.

But, she's still 2, at least for another month. What's kind of new, and I fear progressive, is her ignoring my direction until I break into Mother Dearest screeches.

And I have to feel a little bad that she cried for an hour today over a teddy bear we couldn't find. How sad is that? Disappointment, I'm afraid, has begun.

Just wait until she discovers what an ass I am... Poor girl.

Yessie Messy

Here's a little piece from the NY Times article, "Say Yes To Mess."

"Studies are piling up that show that messy desks are the vivid signatures of people with creative, limber minds (who reap higher salaries than those with neat "office landscapes") and that messy closet owners are probably better parents and nicer and cooler than their tidier counterparts."

I'd like to say, "Oh yeah. That's me."

But truth is, I like neat. I think the organization movement is the best thing to happen to families this decade. I just bought a shelving system so Carolyn could learn how to put her toys away properly.

Fun? No. Cool? No

Able to find stuff? Yes. I mean no. Sadly, no....

Rainy days and Thurdays

It's not that I don't like rain. I do. I like sleeping to the sound of rain, watching movies to the pitter-patter of raindrops against the window and snuggle up to a large cheesy pizza. Since it's impossible for me to do any of these things with kids, rain has become an effort in frustration.

We went out despite the drizzle. I had the car today (Steve, by the way, has been a real trooper about this one-car thing) so we went to the library. We had loads of fun there. I even kind of hung out with this woman who seemed a lot like me (she knew about the good parking spot AND also needed to fess up to losing a book) and because she was like me, she really didn't know how to spark an interesting conversation. Or maybe she just wasn't that in to me...

Anyhow, it was kind of fun because Penelope and her little girl were playing together, which was totally cute. Penny was kind of following this other kid around and they ended up sitting together watching fish while Carolyn and I did a puzzle.

Since Carolyn was in , "Mommy. Sit here with ME. Play with ME. Sit down mommy" mode, it was nice to have Penelope distracted for a few minutes. And for Penny, nothing's more fun than sitting. Sitting rocks.

Post holiday glow

Today, I was a woman on a mission. I took down all the Christmas decorations. I rearranged the living room. I collected an entire tub of toys for storage. I took in the recycling, including from Christmas. I cleaned the 5,000 tree needles hiding strategically throughout the house.

And I managed to save 75 percent off a wreath at Target's last-ditch sale, go to the park (twice) and watch the Simpson's. I love the end of the holiday season.

It just feels wrong. Who hates Christmas decorations? The endless shopping and eating? The constant stream of gifts?

Well, it's not that I hate them, really. OK maybe a little. I just love resumed order. I love the workweek and its cyclical nature. I love no longer sharing my living room with a tree.

So farewell Christmas/New Year's holiday. Maybe we'll see you around next year.